As stated in this hilarious Knowledge Base article, changing your power options to “High Performance” (an option Microsoft conveniently hides under a “more” menu to prevent you from accidentally finding it) resolves this issue by using more power all the time. In return, you need to accept that global warming is entirely your fault. Amazingly, no performance analyser of SQL server suggests you change this option.
Sometimes the simplest things can drastically change performance. There should be an interview-style wizard or report for those who are new to setting up a server that would interrogate WMI to find out which settings may be sub-optimal for your usage scenario.